Decisions!

I have titled this blog as 'decisions' because I have recently had to make a major decision. Or at least I think of it as major. To other people it may just be quite simple to say a yes or no - but for me I have to contend with my mixed up thoughts - for example - have I made the right decision for me? - or is this a mistake? - or should I just sit back and let things happen. My mind starts to go around in circles

Then once I have made the decision my mind starts again. Was I wise to do this thing? Did I made the wrong decision? and then I think of the consequences and start worrying about them.

I decided to modernise my kitchen after 25 years. I recently found I had some money available from one of my accounts and felt it was a good way to use it. Money in the bank does not make much interest these days and I would delight in working in a new, brighter environment. My present kitchen is out dated and looking shabby. But I have used it with pleasure. I had it put in soon after I moved in to this house and a very good friend of mine installed it. So I have fond memories, But now I felt I needed a change. Also it would add to the value of the house for when I decide to move to somewhere smaller.

However once I had decided what I was going to have and arranged for the installation I got cold feet. I have spent two sleepless nights going over and over again into the practicalities of getting the kitchen installed. Will it all be delivered in time? Where will I put everything until it is installed? How am I going to clear out my present units? etc etc.

I suppose it shows a lack of confidence in myself. But also it makes me realise how difficult it is to decide major issues on my own. It is a time when I really need someone to share the decision making. It also makes me feel very much alone.

Anyway I cannot go back now as I have ordered everything, paid a deposit and arranged for the builder - so I must just go with it.....!

Otherwise life has been quite good. I had a good holiday in Europe (Prague/Budapest and Vienna) and it was very successful. I had one mishap when I was stung by a wasp and had a very bad reaction and had to go to a hospital in Vienna. (the Austrians were very organised and helpful) and my friend was very supportive - so all ended well.

When I have sorted out my photos I will try and publish one on my next blog.